cloudy sky during the daytime

Worrying Over the Little Things

Ah, worrying over the little things is more common with people than you think. I like to think I’m a lot more in control of my worrying mind nowadays and that my ridiculously worrying days are over. For the most part that’s true but there are still small parts of me where the worrier in me remains. Maybe not always ‘worry’ but a constant wonder, you know?

Take the things that haven’t even happened yet. I get a sense of fear when thinking about seeing certain people in a sudden situation. Or, I still hold onto the wonder of what someone thinks of me if they see me. It’s weird because I know damn right that the person on the other side wouldn’t even have a care in the world.

Here’s what I (and you if you’re in the same boat) need to remember…

  1. There are amazing things happening in your life right now, try to spend more time focusing on those.
  2. Time spent worrying is often time wasted. Use your time wisely and think about the happiest things in your life.
  3. Whenever something’s getting to you (even though it probably shouldn’t), talk to someone because it will help.
  4. You can always write about your thoughts, just like me. Writing definitely is my therapy as it helps me to release what’s on my mind.
  5. Whenever you figure out the small triggers of your worry, try to distance yourself from them without giving them too much attention.

Living with your partner can help to reduce the negative thoughts and wonder going through your mind. They want you to be happy so don’t forget how lucky you are to have a home together and to cherish their company with every chance you get.

Hold onto the closest people in your life, they’ll always help you to see the brighter side to life, no matter what’s going on. A short and sweet post but something to think about, right?

I hope this post helps you if you’ve been worrying about the little things.

Don’t Let Other People Control Your Happiness

It’s time to start putting more effort into my own happiness. It wasn’t so long ago that I thought I was better at letting things go.

Crying isn’t always a bad thing. But surely too much of it can’t be healthy? That’s what I’ve discovered over the last few weeks. People can have an impact on your emotions and they don’t even know it. Perhaps their actions aren’t always intentional but at the same time, they’re just not needed.

What am I going to do about it?

I need to like being myself, which I’m not completely so far away from. But if I could just get rid of this one thing that bugs me more than anything, its people’s opinions, their need to get involved an overwhelming amount or the inappropriate comments and gestures. People close to me advise me to ignore them. That’s where I’m weak. I struggle so much to try to put things to the back of my mind. And when I eventually do, something else pops up.

It’s down to me. For things to change, I need to focus on the more meaningful things in life. There are tonnes of things to smile about and to be thankful for. I’m not going to lose sight of myself trying to please others. Sometimes, it’s about speaking up and being brave.

Think about this too…

You can lose followers on social media but you shouldn’t let this impact your value. And you can have people who you drift anyway from that were your ‘mates’ or ‘friends’. Some of these people come into your life for a reason. Some friendships slip away, meanwhile others can stay forever. It doesn’t matter about the number of friends you have. What matters is, who they truly are. The truth is, I think we’re all worth more than we realise. It’s when you discover who you really are that leads you to believing how important your happiness is.

Am I really lonely? My parents do what they can to support me. My big brothers have always got my back. And I have the most amazing human being (Danny) by my side in all that I do. Surrounding yourself with the ones who love you is much better than being round a hundred people who might not believe in you or value who you really are.

The new adventure is right around the corner

I keep telling myself, “It’s not long now.” Me and Danny are waiting for those two weeks notice or whatever it’ll end up being to notify us when our home will be ready for us. I’ve visioned not only the day but everything leading up to this moment for so long. In fact, we both have. This is our journey. We’re going to travel on it in no other way but ours.

Now, the next time you find yourself becoming so lost in your emotions, fighting against other people’s matters or say, remember what you should really be focusing on. Tell yourself a million times. I should know, I’m constantly sending myself the reminder. If you do feel like you’re falling down again, go to your happy place.

Don’t let other people control your happiness, create your own kind of happiness.

3 Things to Remember When You’re Feeling Frustrated

It’s creeping back, that cloud of feeling frustrated by lots of little things. Rather than being angry I seem more upset. It’s as if working myself up to be annoyed is too much so I just cry and wish people would hold back. Why’s it so difficult for people to do that? Unfortunately we all know that’s not the case. Everybody has to comment on something and it’s so bloody annoying. But life is sometimes, isn’t it?

I’m listening to ‘September Song’ by JP Cooper to chill me out and I think it’s working you know it’s led me to write this blog. Listening to music and blogging really relaxes me. It’s quite therapeutic actually. As amazing as it would be to live a life which isn’t surrounded by judgements and assumptions, the reality is that, there always going to be there.

Throughout any kind of frustration in your life remember these 3 things:

1. Don’t take it out on the wrong person

You can let your emotions get the best of you. Rather than letting the ones who love you and care listen, you take your frustration out on them. Don’t worry, it’s something we’ve all done at some point. Once you realise that you’re hurting the wrong person, you find other ways to revert back to the happier version of yourself before you worried about what anybody says.

2. Just keep being you and do what makes you happy

Okay so now I’m listening to ‘Who You Are’ by Jessie J. She tells us that it’s okay not to be okay. But throughout anything, it’s important to “be true to who you are”. Let’s not allow others ruin our happiness. If you’ve got something good going for you, be proud and keep moving forward. Nothing and no one is perfect but you can have your own kind of perfect. And you deserve to be happy so keep at it.

3. Sometimes it’s best to be in your own company

Listen to music, go for a walk, watch a nice or funny film, find something that works for you. The worst thing you can do though, is to be alone and sit in complete silence in a bundle of worrying thoughts. Find something to concentrate on or something to distract you from feeling frustrated. And yes you guessed it, music and blogging helps with on this one as well.

It can drain you to the point where you become so upset so it’s important to find the things that work for you. What are the 3 things that help you when you’re feeling frustrated?

Why I’m Much Better at Letting Things Go Than I Used to Be

Letting things go – it sounds easier said than done, right? Well that’s what I always thought too. Until the last few months this changed. I always used to tell myself not to stress about the unnecessary. But wow, I didn’t listen to my own thoughts on those occasions. If I couldn’t do something – stress. Something unexpectedly happens and the fear of the unknown scares you – stress. Worrying about other people – stress. 

We all know stress isn’t good for us. But we seem to anyway. Take today for example. It’s Tuesday. Eugh, I just seem to really dislike Tuesdays. It’s not as if it’s a day where people annoy me. But it’s the little things. I learnt that sometimes, I just need to relax and just think, “Ah whatever!”

I woke up and got straight in the shower. Afterwards I spent half an hour trying to find something to wear in this hot weather and suitable for work. What a nightmare. I ended up wearing black trousers. But I couldn’t spend all morning stressing over that.

That’s nothing, right?

So then something else decided to get to me. The First bus app wasn’t working. Something to do with cellular connection I think, who knows?

So I walked back on myself past my house and to the cash machine. Well, the cash machine wasn’t giving me my money. I stayed patient as I noticed that I missed a bus into town. Eventually it withdrawn the cash and I had to pay for a weekly on the bus. I’m pretty gutted because it’s going to cost me more money now over the month period.

Now obviously I wasn’t the happiest bunny this morning. But I could’ve handled it a lot worse. I just ranted to in a few text messages. I didn’t take my frustration out on anybody in person… not even the people who shoved in front of me on the bus just because they felt like they could. I might have shook my head though. That’s my way of letting things go!

And it’s still ‘nothing’ because it could always be worse

That’s just a small example. But even after the ‘worst days ever’ I tell myself it isn’t actually the worst. I’ve chose to let go of the never-ending thoughts that can remain in my mind.

Telling myself that whatever happens, happens has worked for once. Perhaps I used to crave attention from the wrong people. Or was trying to be some sort of perfection. Or even someone who never wanted anything to go wrong. Well, there will always be people who come in and out of your life. Nothing’s ever perfect. And things won’t always go as you expect them to. The sooner you realise that, you’ll breeze through your journey of letting things go. 

I feel as though I’m in much more control

Knowing what/who you want to be in your life really helps. In fact, it plays a huge part. You start to realise what matters, who matters, and those who brought nothing but constant annoyance. Or even, the way you felt like you couldn’t be the best version of yourself because you felt like you had to be something else. It’s funny isn’t it? Simple and small changes can have such a positive impact on your happiness. 

The amount of days, weeks, months or years we have in our future is unknown. That’s why it’s so important to learn to let go of things. You can’t always force things to happen in your life. But remember, you can control how to react to them. And you can make a difference in your own life as well as others’. You’ll feel so much positive energy when you just live, accept things, and be whoever the hell you want to be.

Why don’t you try?

I feel much more confident and believe in myself much more. There were days when I was quite minimal with makeups and effort with my hair. But now there are days where I go makeup free. And I’m not wondering what people think. It makes me feel even better when I do it e.g. on a night out when you dress up and feel nice and girly. Here’s to the rest of the girls out there who have this vision.

The Power of Strengths and Weaknesses

Today I’ve been thinking about what to write. What do I want to share that’s new, something I haven’t done before? That’s when strengths and weaknesses come into my mind. We all have them so it’s a topic for anyone to discuss about how they feel about theirs. Sometimes, no matter how hard you want to try to get rid of a weakness, it isn’t always possible. But you can help yourself by working on ways to overcome particular situations or doing something less.

We all have a weak side

Take me for instance, if you didn’t know already, I’ve always been a massive worrier. That’s my biggest weakness. I’ve realised more than ever this year though just how pointless it can be to worry about things. You think you’re right to at the time then you realise it isn’t relevant or you didn’t have anything to worry about from the start.

Like I’ve said before, it can help to have someone there to show you how strong you can be.

He has given me the most amazing adventure and it’s only been a small part of the rest of our lives together. No matter how many insecurities I’ve had, no matter what weaknesses or downfalls I have, he’s there.

Other times, it’s up to you to decide how strong you can really be. Think of all of the great things you’ve accomplished. Even if it hasn’t been your day, month, or year, there’s got to be something. Earlier this year I felt like giving up. Facing unemployment or unhappiness in the workplace takes a serious toll on so many things in your life that others don’t always realise. However, once I began to believe in myself and that the right job for me would come along, it’s one of the biggest strengths I’ve ever had.

And then we have our strong side to show

March was when it all began to crumble. I began to feel worthless but ever since May this year something changed me as a person and my attitude to everything. Seven months later, I can say that I feel like I’m moving forward. All of your past experiences and choices make you who you are today and I’m proud of where I am. Securing a new permanent position was my most-needed goal for 2017. I’m happy, I’m respected, and growing up has become a whole lot more real. And it’s probably going to become surreal when more goals for the future are accomplished.

Take moving out for example, that was my most-wanted goal for 2017. Although me and Danny haven’t yet got our own place, we understand now that we are on a better path in getting there. Saving is under way and we keep imagining what our lives will be like together in our own home. We have more of an understanding of what it takes to meet that goal and are giving ourselves as much time as it needs in order to happen. That’s another key strength of mine that I like to have – patience.

It’s all down to you, just remember that we all have strengths and weaknesses

I think it can take a lot of persistence, patience, and believing in yourself to get through any kind of year. Remember that you can dream big but you can’t have it all. You might see that some people do ‘have it all’ but you start to realise what’s important in your life. And your life is what matters the most. No matter what your strengths and weaknesses are, you can make things happen.

A Letter to the Me Who Worries

A letter to yourself, some people might think that’s kinda strange. But I don’t. I’ve seen a few recently and it inspired me to create one of my very own. This is a letter to myself, the version of my that worries. Worry seems to be a thing I can’t always balance. There are times when I think, “Yes! I’m feeling so good.” Then something seems to knock it all back down. So if you’re someone like me, please read this post until the very end.

Stop being so self-critical on your appearance

The dry skin; spot; hair that really needs its highlights topping up; your weight; you’ve got a whole list haven’t you? People will tell you that you look okay. Your eyes might see something different than theirs but maybe you do look okay. Who says not looking okay means you need to have perfect skin or looking flawless day in and day out?

You feel bloated quite a lot. But don’t punish yourself by telling yourself that it’s ugly. Just because you’ve been ugly before, doesn’t mean that you are. When you do have that spare time though, take yourself to the hairdressers, a good pamper might just make you feel all the more wonderful.

Stop (or at least try) to stop the little things getting in your way

You can waste so much time battling thoughts in your head. Even when you think you’re in a place where you worry less about this, that, and everything, there’s something. At the back of your mind you feel a big anxious feeling. It’s horrible. No one else seems to get it. But you just want it to go away.

You can randomly wake up some mornings and you know it’s hit you. Try to show that feeling where to go! You’ve got to think that some of the things bothering you, wouldn’t bother others in the slightest. Be the person who carries on walking with their head up high regardless of what anyone says.

Stop getting caught up in things that don’t really matter – all of those little things that are your worries

Time after time you’ve tried to explain what’s wrong and half of the time you’ve sounded so silly. Others have been genuine. But for the other parts, you spent a lot of time wondering. A whole lot of sadness it brought you. Do you remember?

Imagine what your granny and grandad would say to you. Probably something like,

Tasha! Come on. Pull yourself together.

Well granny being the tough one that is. Grandad would tell you, just like he did, that it’s okay to feel down sometimes. But he’d hate the idea of you being down about yourself. As difficult as it might be, try to let go, and enjoy everything you have.

Start living your life your way in the happy way

See how we’ve got onto ‘start’ rather than ‘stop’? That’s because it’s time for you to start. You can carry on beating yourself up mentally. But you know just as much as others, it does no good whatsoever in several different ways. Start your day with more encouragement to yourself. Tell yourself you can do it, and if not, tell yourself you’ll learn how to and try your best.

Smile at every opportunity. Start doing your thing, rather than letting other people’s opinions, lives, and whatever get to you. Some people do this without realising. And you’ll realise that others’ lives aren’t always as perfect as they seem. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Just live. It’s what we’re all here to do. No matter how old you are, tell yourself you’ll make the most of life. And the big thing about this that others won’t see in the same way, it includes saying no. Turning something down or saying no doesn’t mean you aren’t making the most of something. It means you’re choosing what’s best for you at that given time. You’ll see a huge difference. Believe it and you’ll know what I’m talking about.

When you’re at the stage when you’re wondering what’s going on, remember why you started something. Try your best to leave those worries behind. If it’s still worth something today, keep at it. If it’s not, make a change. You’re in control. You’ve got this. And you will accomplish more than you ever imagined when you focus less on your worries.