pointing at heart made from daisies

Recent Thoughts About Self-Love

Until a week or so ago my self-love levels were extremely low. I felt like things were changing. I got back into that place where I disliked loads of things about myself. Telling myself I looked ugly in that outfit or that I’m not good enough so I chose to hide away. I’ve learnt that isolating yourself only makes you feel worse. Sometimes, your own company is good. But too much of it, when you’re putting yourself down isn’t good. It certainly doesn’t help towards improving self-love.

I’ve learnt that avoiding situations can be both, a good and a bad thing. Avoiding situations where all you see are toxic relationships or you feel uncomfortable – I’ve chose to avoid them. Why but yourself into a scenario that makes you feel unhappy? There’s no reason in my eyes. But one thing, I’ve learnt that I need to work on is, to stop pushing people away. Or in fact, pulling myself away.

Self-love starts with being yourself

I’ll never be able to emphasise how important it is to just be yourself. When you can’t come to terms with why someone loves you, or you have a constant cloud of worry hanging over your head – talk to someone. Choose your people wisely. Danny is my person and he always will be. No matter how distant things may seem at times, if you talk to someone, you’ll face a reality. And you’ll see how things really are.

looking out towards the view

There’s nothing wrong with having the need to work on being you. After all, we need to remember that no-one is perfect. Like I’ve said before:

We all have our flaws. We all make mistakes. The important thing is to try not to make the same mistakes over and okay again.

Enjoy being around the people who really make you happy. Remember that, it is okay to say no. But also remember, sometimes its important to make an effort.

Be your own life coach

Make time for the people who make time for you. Put aside the people who wouldn’t even have you as a thought in their mind. That’s when you’ll start to see what you shouldn’t put up with. A greater step towards self-love. Because it isn’t all about appearance. It can be about the people you surround yourself with or environments you put yourself in.

I can’t promise myself or anybody else that I’m a fully confident woman. Sometimes, I will feel rubbish. But for the most part, I try to hold my head up and tell myself, anything is possible. When you start to realise these kind of things, you worry less about what others think.

So… start working on being the best you that you can be. And self-love will come to you. I completed a mindfulness course online once it was really helpful at the time. Take a look via FutureLearn.

leaf in the sunshine

5 Reasons Why You Should Live Life Your Way

Each year it’s good to think about what the future holds. Sometimes we can’t control what happens in our lives but we can try to make things better and just hope that better things are to come. This post discovers the reasons as to why you should live life your way.

Since writing the last post back then focusing on the high school, college, and university me, I’m proud to be the person that I am today. And it still stands to be true today that,

Many of us will go through life where people have particular perceptions of us. Some people might wish for you to go down a certain route in the future.

Since believing this even more, I’ve definitely taken my own path. I’ve made decisions independently. And this is something which really helps you to live life your way. Even throughout all of the worry at the beginning of last year, I am not happier and a lot less anxious than I used to be. And wow it feels so good. We all learn lessons in life of how to do things better next time, or when to not do things at all.

Thinking about this year, there are lots to look forward to. My blog will turn 3 in July, I’m saving up even more money for mine and Danny’s future, and I just know that there’s so much more to come.

Here’s why you should live life your way

1. You’re a happier person when you’re being yourself
2. You have one life to live and that’s your life to live
3. It’s better to travel on a path taking your own decisions
4. It’s your chance to shine and be independent
5. You spend life doing what you love

Wouldn’t you rather spend your time finding yourself, rather than living the life of someone else? The minute you think you want to act or look like someone else, you’re taking away your own personality traits, goals, and appearance.

Be the person who is the true you, the one that says “I did this for me” at the proudest moments in your life. If I wasn’t myself, I wouldn’t have been to fight to where I am today. You can’t live your life in the shoes of someone else when you’ve got your own to walk in.

What’s the thing that you love the most about living life your way?

you are enough written in a notebook

All About Embracing Who You Are

You’re struggling to find the things to embrace who you are. You know when you’re in need of one of those pick-me-up kind of days? I’ve had a few recently but don’t we all? I’ve been told I’m random, weird, and giddy on many occasions. Does this mean I’m an average kind of person? Whilst looking back on old blog posts for some inspiration, I came across one about self-love and I read a couple of particular sentences. I thought to myself, “Wow, who wrote that?!” Sometimes, I need to remember what I tell others, and start to tell myself even more.

Rather than focusing on what you want to be, you can take the time to focus on who you are today. Think about your strengths and weaknesses. Throughout all of your experiences and endeavours, remember that the truest person to be is yourself.

1. Appearance on the outside

Who doesn’t love a good snack? I’ll feel bloated quite often and it frustrates the life out of me. Most of it is about drinking enough water and all the obvious stuff. One thing I wish I didn’t feel, is knowing how uncomfortable you feel and someone making a comment about you eating too many snacks or whatever. It doesn’t hurt to treat yourself, you know. I’ll never go into overdrive where I turn obese. Come on if I get upset when I’m bloated, there’s no way I could let it go any further because I like how I am. And I think others should like who they are too, no matter what shape or size. It’s time to show society how happy we really are on the outside.

Another thing I need to remember is that we never look perfect. You’ve got to stop punishing your mind. When you find something that you don’t like about yourself over and over you’re damaging all the positivity that there is about you. I wrote the following on Twitter the other night and other girls seemed to relate.

The other night before I went out with one of my friends, I told myself that I didn’t like my hair, my makeup, or how I looked in my dress. After trying on over 4 different outfits and deciding I was going with that same red dress again, I just told myself that I’m going out to enjoy myself, not to be cautious of how I look all night. And that’s exactly what I ended up doing (eventually). Embrace whatever look you end up having.

2. The personality and the emotions 

Beauty is a perception. Everyone has their own version of what beautiful is. But do you know what I think the most important part of us is? Our personalities and our feelings. There are so many things you can let get in the way if you don’t try to stop them or try to put them elsewhere. You shouldn’t let anyone put you down for being ‘over emotional’ or worrying too much. Because in fact, it makes you even more anxious. My advice to you is, surround yourself with the people who are true to you and you’ll always be true to yourself.

No number of ‘rating’ or amount of makeup can overpower a personality. The inner you can be the most beautiful kind of you there is. The way I see it, it’s good to laugh, to smile, and to have fun. But you’re going to experience times where you just don’t see it that way. Maybe you’re worrying about too many what ifs, certain people, or past experiences. Let it go. Seriously, only you can set yourself free out of this bubble of worry. Even if someone still has negative perception of you, or just something that you don’t see, why should that stop you from being who you are?

3. There’s so much you’ve got to embrace

To the people who read this, I hope that you really think about who you are. If you’re someone who’s been putting yourself down a lot. Get back up. Negative comments on essays at university didn’t stop me developing my blog. Rejections getting a full-time permanent position didn’t make me feel weak. It only made me stronger. And for that, it lead me to the right place for me.

Being mistreated and judged didn’t stop me from carrying on. Having someone who no longer wanted me didn’t stop me from finding true love. The thing is, many things in life are temporary. Situations and people will come into your life. If something happens that you wish didn’t, turn it into something that can help you be who you really want to be. Don’t do it for anyone else but you.

It’s time for you to love yourself. Embrace who you are. You’re not the average person that you think you are. You’re so much more. Remember, knock-backs only make you get up to fight harder.

bath salts and flower

4 Thoughts for Self-Care September

There isn’t a more perfect time than Self-Care September to write this post. I’ve been reading a lot about appearance and personalities recently and I wanted to tell you what I think. Especially because I’ve been that person who spends too much time worrying about what others think.

The person who’s most important is you. You’re the person in your body and it’s important to remember inner beauty just as much as someone’s outer beauty. Why? Because we’re all beautiful in some way or another.

You are good enough

Rather than thinking about why you’re not good enough, think about why you are. Are you guilty of putting yourself down? Here’s what you’ve got to remember, just because you’re finding all the good things about other people whether it be how they look or seem, doesn’t mean you haven’t got those traits too. Who knows you might even have better ones in certain areas. Rather than feeling down, we should lift each other.

Smile and be kind

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. It doesn’t cost a thing. Being kind doesn’t have to be about buying someone a billion presents. The best representation of kindness is often shown by the smallest gestures. There will be mornings where I’m on my way to work and someone will smile at me. It’s those little things that can make me smile through the rest of my day.

You’re allowed to say no

Don’t let the fear of saying no beat you up inside. You’re free to feel and respond how you like. If you’d feel more comfortable not doing something then don’t feel you have to do it for someone/something. You’ll start to feel so free and really find yourself when you make your own choices for you. Self-care is also about finding yourself. And when you say no to some things, you often realise how strong you can be.

You are capable of bigger and better things

If you’re in that place that feels like you’re getting nowhere. You feel as though you have nothing going for you. Don’t push the people away who love you the most. Try to make them understand how it feels. Sometimes, they’ll only ever be certain people who really do understand you. Don’t let anyone think your dreams are too big. You can accomplish more than you think.

For my own wellbeing I am going to try to action particular things to promote self-care. I plan to carry on believing in myself and compare myself to others a lot less. I’ve made progress previously with this but there’s always room for improvement. It’s starts and continues with me. Here’s to a happier, healthier minded me.

How are you going to practice self-care this month?

flowers with blurred background

Why You Should Learn to Love Yourself

Last night I sat down and was wondering what to write about for my next blog post. One topic that came to my mind was self-love. Something that many of us don’t do enough of. And why? Perhaps they don’t see their inner or outer beauty; maybe they compare themselves to others too much; or maybe they only see the things they could have done better.