Stick to Being Happy Rather Than Wondering

Sitting here wondering what to write when deep down you’ve had an idea of something you’ve been thinking about writing – being happy. You hear the sentences through your head on your way home from work. But getting to grips with how to put it all together is another story. So here goes. This is going to be a post which literally comes out as I write down thoughts that pop into my head.

We spend so much time wishing for things. And sometimes they can be for things you want to happen that probably won’t. I don’t mean the game console you’ve been dying to by or the outfit you’ve had your eye on for ages. This is more about longing for something to happen. I’ve come to terms that it’s okay to dream of nice things. I’ve always told myself and others that it’s okay to dream big. Do what makes you happy.

But here’s something to think about… 

Do you ever find yourself wishing you could go back in time? Perhaps you wanted to change something? Or relive a moment all over again. Reality can get you down. But it can also be so worthwhile. You can think you’ve had the worst day/week/month, whatever. There’s always something who’s really struggling. Be grateful for those who love to be around you. Make it a whole lot easier on yourself and disregard the ones who couldn’t give a damn. You’ll be happy then.

walking on the sandy beach

Memories can come flooding back, good or bad. But where you are right now in this moment is what counts. Everything you’ve experienced in your life so far is shaped who you are today. So what, you could’ve done that differently and you certainly couldn’t handled that better. But you know what? Life goes on. We shouldn’t spend time going over and over on things. It’s so damaging.

Hold onto the good things that make or have made you happy

Hold the memories that made the smile. The ones that made you feel like you were the most careless, free-spirited version of you. There’s nothing stopping you from being that person again. I like to think that even when there’s silence between people, it doesn’t mean to say either of them doesn’t care about the other. Time teaches us so much. It can show you that you can genuinely drift away onto different paths.

There’s another side I like to look at. And that’s the people who would probably never get it. But it can make you feel so happy when there’s a little bit of conversation there. Or even more than you imagined. When they haven’t forgot things. And it’s as if nothing’s changed no matter how much time apart – that’s another good thing to hold onto. You might wish you had the chance to see someone again. Don’t lose perspective. We all have our lives to live and so on. There’s so much in your life to value. And there’s probably things you wouldn’t even realise that people value about you.

So yeah, it’s been a bit of all things tonight. But there’s got to be someone out there who can grasp what I’m trying to say. Drifting away from this a little bit here’s a little update with me…

Maybe I’m getting somewhere, maybe I’m not?

Since more tests and investigations, the mystery continues. I kinda had a feeling this was going to happen anyway. All of my tests are complete. The kidney and bladder scan came back normal (so the receptionist said) yay! Just one more appointment to go before holiday now. And that’s something I really can’t wait for. To just relax and not have to worry about a thing. I’ve been referred to the hospital in June once I’m back though. And I can guarantee they’ll think my body is a mystery too! But they have to keep searching I guess. Staying happy is the main thing. I better try to keep at it…

notepad coffee and roses on table

A Letter to the Me Who Worries

A letter to yourself, some people might think that’s kinda strange. But I don’t. I’ve seen a few recently and it inspired me to create one of my very own. This is a letter to myself, the version of my that worries. Worry seems to be a thing I can’t always balance. There are times when I think, “Yes! I’m feeling so good.” Then something seems to knock it all back down. So if you’re someone like me, please read this post until the very end.

Stop being so self-critical on your appearance

The dry skin; spot; hair that really needs its highlights topping up; your weight; you’ve got a whole list haven’t you? People will tell you that you look okay. Your eyes might see something different than theirs but maybe you do look okay. Who says not looking okay means you need to have perfect skin or looking flawless day in and day out?

You feel bloated quite a lot. But don’t punish yourself by telling yourself that it’s ugly. Just because you’ve been ugly before, doesn’t mean that you are. When you do have that spare time though, take yourself to the hairdressers, a good pamper might just make you feel all the more wonderful.

Stop (or at least try) to stop the little things getting in your way

You can waste so much time battling thoughts in your head. Even when you think you’re in a place where you worry less about this, that, and everything, there’s something. At the back of your mind you feel a big anxious feeling. It’s horrible. No one else seems to get it. But you just want it to go away.

You can randomly wake up some mornings and you know it’s hit you. Try to show that feeling where to go! You’ve got to think that some of the things bothering you, wouldn’t bother others in the slightest. Be the person who carries on walking with their head up high regardless of what anyone says.

Stop getting caught up in things that don’t really matter – all of those little things that are your worries

Time after time you’ve tried to explain what’s wrong and half of the time you’ve sounded so silly. Others have been genuine. But for the other parts, you spent a lot of time wondering. A whole lot of sadness it brought you. Do you remember?

Imagine what your granny and grandad would say to you. Probably something like,

Tasha! Come on. Pull yourself together.

Well granny being the tough one that is. Grandad would tell you, just like he did, that it’s okay to feel down sometimes. But he’d hate the idea of you being down about yourself. As difficult as it might be, try to let go, and enjoy everything you have.

Start living your life your way in the happy way

See how we’ve got onto ‘start’ rather than ‘stop’? That’s because it’s time for you to start. You can carry on beating yourself up mentally. But you know just as much as others, it does no good whatsoever in several different ways. Start your day with more encouragement to yourself. Tell yourself you can do it, and if not, tell yourself you’ll learn how to and try your best.

Smile at every opportunity. Start doing your thing, rather than letting other people’s opinions, lives, and whatever get to you. Some people do this without realising. And you’ll realise that others’ lives aren’t always as perfect as they seem. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Just live. It’s what we’re all here to do. No matter how old you are, tell yourself you’ll make the most of life. And the big thing about this that others won’t see in the same way, it includes saying no. Turning something down or saying no doesn’t mean you aren’t making the most of something. It means you’re choosing what’s best for you at that given time. You’ll see a huge difference. Believe it and you’ll know what I’m talking about.

When you’re at the stage when you’re wondering what’s going on, remember why you started something. Try your best to leave those worries behind. If it’s still worth something today, keep at it. If it’s not, make a change. You’re in control. You’ve got this. And you will accomplish more than you ever imagined when you focus less on your worries.

Why You Don’t Have To Explain Yourself

Do you ever feel sick of having to explain yourself? Someone’s always got to ask why. Why can’t you go? Why can’t you afford it? Or “I just don’t understand…” and starts to add their own version of things up. The end of today has been one of those days where I just feel so fed up. Everyone sees a smiley face. Sometimes I feel like no one understands me. There are so many questions being asked that bug the life out of me. So here’s some thoughts about it all.

It’s your life and you have the right to make your decisions

The constant wonder of someone questioning your decisions. But they don’t need to be questioned. We all have own goals to pursue and ways of achieving them. Stop asking why or saying I don’t understand why you can’t just… It’s driving me insane. In time, people will see that why it was better to be so patient. And they will see just how amazing something can be when you stick to your guts.

It bugs me when someone judges or questions you just because you’re not doing what they would want to do. You hear so many people say, well if I was you or, I’ve never known you to like/not like…

Well guess what, I’m me! Thanks for telling me your thoughts but I think I do a better job of being myself than anybody else. If you can’t accept that I don’t/do want to do something, that’s your problem. Please don’t expressing your confusion or criticism with me. 

You don’t have to justify everything just because someone’s curious

I wish people could leave us to it. Stop making it your business to find out what I’m spending my money on. What does it really matter to you? Notice how you keep telling me your business but I never ask about yours because I honestly don’t make it any concern of mine. I’m sick of having other peoples’ problems on my mind. Hearing stories I don’t need to be told about frustrates me, especially when I’ve said before that I’m not interested.

I just feel so fed up recently even though I have good things happening around me. I have a roof over my head. I’m not starved; nor am I unwell. The doctor does want me to relax as my blood pressure has been high again. But as many of you will be aware, that’s exactly why I’m writing this post. Blogging is my therapeutic calming cure. It releases all of my thoughts and hey, it produces a new blog post for you all to read.

Wanting time alone or not putting everything in the open is allowed

What I’m trying to tell you when times get like this is, keep your head up. It’s so important to do your own thing. Of all the people in the world, there has to be some of us that believe in doing our own thing. The type of people that want to do something for themselves, as selfish as it may seem to others, is something I totally get. If you don’t then that’s fair enough.

walking towards a windmill

How Our Body and Mind Reflects the Confidence We Have

This post couldn’t come at a more perfect time. With all of the thoughts going through my mind over the recent couple of months, it’s time to reflect once again. And this time it’s on confidence.

I am happy to say that I am finally happy with how my blog is. I was having all kinds of thoughts about how I wanted it to look different. But as it stands, I’m going to stick with it as it now. The much more important part is the content. I thought I was losing my love for writing but it turns out I was being side-tracked. Focusing on something which wasn’t as important – making everything look perfect.

Perfection doesn’t lead to confidence

There’s never a day where I think I look perfect, never mind the appearance of my blog. There are some days where I’ll feel good about myself but I’ll always find a flaw. People will compliment and I’ll still find that flaw. Over the past couple of special occasions I’ve felt quite fed up. Feeling like my blog wasn’t going anywhere anymore was part of this. Though, it hasn’t been the biggest factor. Now that I’ve seen giving it all up would be stupid it’s time to look at myself.

It’s funny really. People hear that I blog. They don’t know what it is. And sometimes I have to tell them to explore my blog in order to see what it’s all about. That’s because I’m happy to say that I don’t have a niche. It covers bits of everything – many different aspects of lifestyle experiences. And includes the odd sponsored post with brands here and there.

It’s time to change my outlook

Within these past couple of weeks I’ve noticed that one thing has changed my outlook on things. And that all begins with comparison. The worst thing you can ever do to yourself, comparing yourself to others.

I don’t always have the clearest skin; my belly is often bloated and feels horrible even when others don’t see it; I don’t like to show my ‘prettiest’ look every day. That’s okay. I actually cried last week. I know, I’m silly. But it can put you down once one thing gets to you and you let others follow.

Just because one dress doesn’t zip up doesn’t mean another won’t. Yes – I had a meltdown over clothes not fitting, looking like I’d put on weight (because I probably have put on a few pounds). Well, I’ve not done too bad in over the last couple of years or so considering how much I love food!

Things won’t always go to plan, or meet expectations. But you can try a different way and exceed those expectations.

I might put off exercise here and there. But I’ve been looking at myself in the mirror so many times and not liking what I see. I know that if you want something you should work for it. But sometimes, you feel so unmotivated that sense of I can do this disappears.

An eye opener in confidence

I’ve opened my eyes and know that I’m not always going to like something but it doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t love myself. It hasn’t helped when you’ve seen someone look at the part of you that you dislike. But eventually you will be able to hold your head up and ignore it. That’s the only way you can carry on being you. And most of all, being a happy you.

I’ve spent more days going out of the house with less or no make-up on at all. At first you can worry about the looks because you feel like you don’t have that fresh-faced look going for you. Especially when it makes you look just as young. Then you think, to hell with that. It’s me. That’s who I am.

Even though I feel like I’m seen by more people on those kind of occasions, I just need to think, there are plenty of people who find the confidence, and so can I. Past experiences have made me switch to a less confident me at times. It’s all about passing those obstacles. They’ll be back and I just have to be strong and fight harder.

It’s good to have my confidence back

When you get that boost in your mood back, you’ll feel motivated by many things. Take today for instance, I put some music on and got my head down to get this piece together. It worked. Finally! I’ve got my confidence back.

I can breathe again without having those bundle of thoughts in the back of my mind. Or at least less of them. That’s much better than an overload of worry which often leads to headache and shakiness. I get enough of those two as it is. My migraine medication might reduce the frequency but I have to work with them too.

Isn’t it about time that you found that confidence in yourself again? If I can do it, you definitely can.

Anxiety Shouldn’t Change Who We Are

I’ve written this post to help raise awareness of anxiety for Spink Health’s campaign. Please note, this is not a gifted or sponsored collaboration.

Anxiety hits many of us. As we are all individuals, we deal with things in our own way. But what does the term ‘anxiety’ actually mean? People can often confuse the term with ‘stress’.

Here’s how Spink describe the difference between the two:

When You Discover Certain Lessons in Life

We live in a world full of judgements and assumptions. Do you know what I take from it all? You shouldn’t have to prove what a good person you are. If you believe you’re doing well and you’re doing what’s best for you making you happy, then go for it! We are always learning.

Over the past few weeks I’ve been challenged with my emotions and it’s affected me in many ways. I’ve felt powerless, fed-up and definitely not a version of me that I have enjoyed. There have been many occasions where my emotions have run high and then sadly deflated.

The inner and outer version of you

One thing I’ve learnt with appearance is that we don’t need to look beautiful on the outside to feel beautiful on the inside.

This morning, I woke up feeling fresh and went to the gym. Through the week, there were parts of me that felt like I had given up myself, like I had no more fight left in me. I’ve felt drained both mentally and physically.

So after a good work-out which was very well needed, I felt more positivity enter my day. I arrived home to my boyfriend and I was jumping around the house with my giddy head on. Today has been a day where I’ve smiled and it’s because I woke up clear-minded (for once) with time to feel free and focus on me.

Deep down, I know that a decision I made this week is certainly the right one to have been made. What a huge learning curve.

Health is more important

Health is worth a whole lot more than all the money and expectations in this world that we feel we need to pursue from time-to-time. Of course, we need money to live and to cater for those around us. People have families, bills, homes etc. But sometimes, it’s about taking a moment to yourself and not letting anything or anyone abuse your good nature, or punishing your mind.

I’d like to say that I am a good person and I don’t believe in being like anybody else or changing yourself to please another. To that article on Facebook the other day, if I want to eat rice cakes, I’ll eat rice cakes, regardless of your information that, they aren’t as heathy as they seem.

It’s my decision

And to the people who don’t respect my decisions, it’s for me at the end of the day, not you. Where’s the harm in wanting to take on a better challenge to make you happy?

Here’s me – I’m about half a stone heavier than I was since high the beginning of college. That’s almost seven years which have passed, so what’s wrong with that? I tackled thoughts in my head thinking I’ve let myself go… but maybe I started to eat more food and enjoyed it (mmm those milky ways) or maybe it’s because I’m now a full-grown woman.

Ever stepped onto the scales and awaited your results to tell you what your weight is? I have gone round in circles to upset myself for not losing weight. Then I remind myself, that I’ve become more active to feel better about myself and to tone up. I need to stop punishing my mind for thoughts that are not necessary.

I’ve been learning that sometimes motivation won’t always hit you. I have been arriving home feeling the need to write a blog post, then I’ve reminded myself of how down and different I feel to then have put my laptop as well as remained quietly in the house.

But now that I’ve finally spoke up, I feel free. Temporary feelings shouldn’t hurt your mind to the point where you cannot sleep, eat, or think as a result of that.

Top tips for learning in life

  • Tip 1: If something’s bugging you, don’t sit quietly in the corner like I did. Speak to someone and make sure something’s done about it. And if it isn’t, take that step and make a change for you.
  • Tip 2: Look at yourself and not the appearance of others. You’re you, so be you!
  • Tip 3: You’re stronger than you think and a whole lot smarter than other people perceive you to be.

Capabilities

Having the potential to do something does not mean to say that people should take advantage of your skills and knowledge to the point where you just can’t take it anymore. We are all human beings, but it seems as though we’re all different kinds.

This week I’ve surprised myself. As a child I was always known as this quiet little girl who would sit back and let anyone speak to her the way they did. I couldn’t always handle a joke and I most certainly never knew how to speak back to someone if they hurt my feelings or if they were trying to offend me.

Recently, up until the end of this week, I’ve been feeling like that little girl over again. I’ve let people walk over me and I’ve accepted that it’s the right thing to do. I’ve never really known what true anxiety felt like but it turns out I’ve been experiencing it for months for now.

I wasn’t going to let it beat me though. I finally spoke up for myself and made a change. And wow it’s a huge heavy weight that has been lifted off my shoulder. No one knows what the future holds but I do sure know one thing, I’ve experienced a great deal of belittle and bother to take whatever is going to come my way, now or in the future.

The world is your oyster

I’ve always wondered what the phrase the world is your oyster really means. Obviously, I got the part where it meant, we are in a place to take on the opportunities that life has to offer. But I’ve began to feel much more by it. My mum said it to me the other day and I stopped and thought to myself, there’s a whole big wide world out there, and we can take on anything we want.

I believe that there’s always so much more to life than some people perceive. I believe in enjoying a job but enjoying life outside of work, in the way that I believe in working hard, but also getting the chance to relax and unwind.

You’re stronger than you think

Over the past couple of months, I’ve felt like a much weaker person than I thought I was. Then I remembered that I don’t deserve to feel this way. I looked at everything I’ve achieved since being the timid girl that I was. I know that I want to be successful in life, and doing what I’ve done doesn’t make me a failure. It see it as making the chance to build new adventures.

Thinking about success, it’s about being happy along the way too. Today, I feel a lot more powerful than I did. I look towards my friends and my family and feel so grateful. But I know that I have the strength independently to tackle things on my own too. If you believe that you are capable then you can achieve. You just have to try and try.

You can walk or run – whichever you decide, go at the pace that’s right for you. Remember you are always learning. And sometimes learning is about finding what’s best for you.

Have a lovely weekend everyone. I’m going to make the most of it – enjoy a night out with the girls tonight then spend time seeing family tomorrow. And here’s to hopefully not having that pre-Monday anxiety feeling at the end of Sunday.