pages of a book folded into a heart shape

39 weeks pregnant

Photo from pexels.com by Rahul Pandit.

This morning I woke up and smiled. It’s Sunday which means a new week in my pregnancy journey and today marks a whole new month and that I am officially 39 weeks pregnant! Let me just take a moment to let that sink in… wow. I thought it would be the perfect time to reflect on my pregnancy journey – the reality of it and the many things I have learnt. This post is solely based on my experience and what I have felt.

The sickness has been real

Yep! The sickness made an appearance early on in the first trimester around 5 weeks. And just when I thought I had said goodbye around 12-13 weeks, it came back with a vengeance throughout several weeks in the third trimester. In fact, just a few days ago I woke up coughing to be sick in the night – it was a bit more like reflux/indigestion brought that one on though. Would I want to take any of it away? I hate being sick with a migraine or if I have a terrible hangover but this was different. As tough it has been at times, it reminded me that our baby boy was there and each day we were one step closer to his due date.

Emotions have been stronger than ever

Highs and lows – I’ve felt a mixture of both – mostly highs though. I have questioned so many parts of pregnancy. This includes many what ifs or what if I can’t… moments. I look back and wonder how many times Danny has told me to never worry because I have him. He is right but it’s only natural to have worries I suppose, especially when it’s my mind doing the thinking! At times, I struggled with some comments but I decided to take them with a pinch of salt and to continue doing our own thing. it is our journey after all.

On the other side of things, it has been much more special than I could have ever imagined. I did not know just how blessed we would be to watch a tiny little human growing inside of me. To feel him kick, wriggle and push his heel as far as he can around my ribs, side, and back! It’s all been so heartwarming. And I’m not going to go any further because these emotions of mine are at an all time high. The excitement is well and truly around but I am also feeling very sentimental the closer we get to baby’s arrival.

Mum instincts kicked in

I don’t think it took too long for those maternal instincts to kick in. I used to cry when I seen ‘not pregnant’ or 1 line on a test even though I was on contraception. It might sound silly but sometimes I thought my body was telling me I still might be. Danny and I had the conversation many times over the year and we finally decided it was time. I made choices to make sure my body could be in the best possible state, had regular check ups with my GP etc. who was so lovely to chat about anything. Before we knew it, everything changed. I got to see PREGNANT on the test and my body really was giving me signs beforehand. Since then, I have felt my stomach, rubbed and comforted my baby bump ever since he was just a tiny little thing. I have even spoke to him, played music and Danny has kissed bump to let him know he is there too.

It’s incredible the strength I found once becoming pregnant. You realise what really matters and how important your health is for both you and your baby. I have been very lucky to have been closely monitored by the team at MAViS (part of Tommy’s Research Centre at St Mary’s Hospital) for my blood pressure and any other concerns. They have always put me and baby first. I have learnt not to ignore any sudden changes, reduced movements, or when you just think something isn’t right.

I’ve treasured it all

Every single little moment, no matter how big or small is so special and touching. I have stored all of baby’s scans and bump progress photos on my phone and backed up onto my Mac. My body has gone through so many changes – physically and mentally. It’s incredible. I’m still amazed that a woman can keep babies warm and snuggled up inside our bodies. My womb has been has been baby’s home for so long and he is going to be in our house soon, the 3 of us living together as a little family. I have tried my best not to take any part of this journey for granted. I will never stop saying how lucky and blessed we are already.


As I am nearing the end of my pregnancy journey, I really am starting to feel a little sensitive. I have carried our little boy for 9 months and amazing as it’ll be when he is on the outside world, how is it going to feel no longer having a bump? He won’t be inside wriggling away, he will be here with us to hold. Can my body take all of this in? I will miss many things about pregnancy but each day has led us to what’s about to be one of the biggest days of our lives. It’s not long until we will find out just how it’ll feel to welcome our first newborn baby into the world.

teddy bear looking at window

Thoughts of a mum to be as due date approaches

Featured image from pexels.com

Becoming a mum for the first time, for me, has brought the most exciting and heartwarming journey but little bits of worry are starting to creep up now. After speaking to a couple of friends and of course my Danny, they know it’s most likely down to the closeness of baby’s due date approaching. Little things are building up in my mind – some of which won’t even be a thought when baby is on the outside world no doubt. Here are some pieces of advice that I am going to let soak in and remember the next time I start to feel a little panicked.

Not everything can be done in a day!

This one is from myself. As baby’s arrival gets closer, I keep looking at things that are lying around the house upstairs because we are in the middle of having some things sorted out e.g. shower and retiling, paint tins in the room, bits of clutter we are waiting to be collected etc. Danny has done an amazing job with the decorating around the house. The only other main room to do now is the living room and small touching up around the completed ones. Once bits of furniture we don’t need anymore are gone, I’m sure I’ll feel much happier to see less clutter.

You’ll laugh at me right now because as far as baby is concerned, everything in place so I shouldn’t be so bothered but hey, it’s me. Another thing that bugs me is the constant sight of spiders. Yes, I know that sounds random but they are everywhere at the minute. I am going to try some peppermint oil and hope that does the trick. It’s one fear I don’t think will ever completely go away. I’m going to have more things on my hands soon to worry about, so I’ll have to try my best to ignore those creepy crawlies! Typing these things makes me feel pretty daft but it’s the truth.

You’ve got food, nappies, warmth, and a whole lot of love!

A lovely friend said this to me just this morning and she’s absolutely right. All of these little stresses I have at the moment will disappear once our little one is here. He is going to be so loved and bring a whole new light and level of happiness into our lives. I’ve got to stay as happy as I can to make him happy – that goes for today and once he is born.

It amazes me every day that we are brining a new life into the world. A baby boy, a son to call our own. When I take this piece of advice on board, it gets me thinking about his little face, what his little fingers and toes are going to look like, and when we look into each other’s eyes for the first time. This is such a special time and I am going to remind myself to cherish these last few weeks because as excited as we are, I know I’ll miss having a baby bump, watching him grow and wriggle around.

You’ve got me, everything will be okay!

Time and time again, Danny will say, “Tasha, do you really think I’ll let anything happen to you.” He tells me that we’re in this together and no matter what challenges come our way, we will face them as a team. Even though he constantly tells me he is right – guess what, he is right again! Danny has things on his mind too but he knows that the both of us will work together and give our baby all of the love in the world and that’s the most important thing they need.

Over the last couple of weeks, I have been chatting away to Danny to say, “What if I do this or that wrong?” or “What if I struggle in labour?” These are normal thoughts, right? If anything happens before I go into hospital, Danny will be here before I know it. Before the days we got together, he looked after me, and now he is there for me more than ever. Every bone in his body is full of love, support, and understanding (he has also picked up my foreign Tasha language really well!)

We’ve got this!

So, it goes without saying, I am bound to worry a little or a lot, just like any mum to be. But I can 100% say that I am looking forward to every moment to come. The cries, sleepless nights, and challenges with patience will hit for sure but it is going to be really worth it. For two people who have always wanted a child, there isn’t a single moment we will take for granted.

gender neutral baby clothes and booties

Mum to be – what to pack in your hospital bag

Featured image from Pexels.com. The links in this post are not sponsored or affiliated. Some of the items in mum’s bag reflects on the summer season baby will be born.

Are you a mum to be like me and are thinking about what to pack in your hospital bag? I am 36 weeks in but have had our bags packed for a while now just in case I go into labour early because you never know! Anyone that knows me understands how organised I like to be so where I can, I try to make that possible.

In early August, Danny and I are expecting our first child. Due to Covid we haven’t been able to attend any antenatal classes in person but there have been a few we have seen available online, two of which we have attended for free. The class by Let’s Talk Birth and Baby gave us an idea of what to pack in our hospital bags along with other little tips we read online.

How many bags do I need to pack?

We have gone with 3 bags – 1 for me, 1 for baby, and Danny is taking his rucksack. Mine is a lovely pink bag I had already bought from Amazon in 2019. It’s great for overnight or weekend stays if you go on a trip too. A few months ago, we purchased a cute set of maternity and changing bags and are using one of them for baby.

What’s in baby’s bag?

We decided to pack the following items for baby. Some parents would take less and some take more. Also, a little tip which might help, putting a nappy, vest, baby grow and newborn hat in a little sandwich bag, helps to keep things organised.

  • Newborn vests x 3-5
  • New born sleep suits/baby grows x 3-5
  • Small pack of newborn nappies (we chose the free Pampers pack we got from Emma’s Diary
  • Cotton wool balls
  • Cellular blanket
  • Ready made formula and bottles (for mums who choose to formula feed)
  • Going home outfit
  • Mini Sudocrem and Bepanthen cream (couldn’t decide)
  • Newborn hat x2
  • Muslin cloths
  • Don’t forget the car seat!

What’s in mum’s bag?

  • Comfy nighty x2
  • Maternity sanitary towels
  • Breast pads
  • Mini shampoo and conditioner
  • Mini shower gel and sponge
  • Dark towel for shower
  • Mini pack of face wipes
  • Deodorant
  • Phone charger
  • Snacks – I’m thinking fruit, snack bars, Snack a Jacks, fruit juice etc.
  • Black knickers and comfy wireless bra
  • Lip balm
  • Slippers and socks (not sure if I’ll wear the socks or not)
  • Light robe – it’s way too warm for a fluffy dressing gown!
  • Loose going home outfit – leggings, a baggy top OR a loose maxi dress (depends on how I feel) with flip flops
  • Hair scrunchie (or bobble)
  • Toothbrush and toothpaste
  • Hairbrush
  • Small concealer/foundation – wonder if it’ll actually get used!
  • Puzzle book
  • Little bag for dirty washing
  • Prescribed medication
  • Don’t forget your maternity notes (and birth plan if you have one)

What’s in dad’s bag?

  • Deodorant
  • Toothbrush
  • Extra set of clothes (just in case)
  • Snacks – leaving Danny to choose!
  • Drinks – no doubt an energy drink or two
  • There’s enough of the other toiletries above for both of us

Some mums have their own idea of what they would like to pack but I hope this helps other first time mums who are wondering where to start. And I honestly think it’s never too early to be prepared.

Good luck to all of the mamas to be out there!

hearts in the sky

What does 4th July mean to me?

4th July – I like to think it’s where it all began. The date marks a special memory for Danny and I and it doesn’t have anything to do with America celebrating Independence Day! On 4th July 2010, we met with a couple of friends to say goodbye to our primary school before it was being knocked down. Not for one minute did I imagine that day would play a part in where we are today.

Most days our version of saying “Hi” was smiling at one another when we bumped into each other or passed in the college corridors. I even remember going into reception as I was about 5 minutes away from my Spanish lesson beginning. I didn’t like how I looked that day but he still turned my way and smiled. Then there was there was a day I was sat outside an exam room waiting for my speaking exam like a nervous wreck… again for Spanish!

I look back and wish I had more confidence to bring more conversation in person. We always had a laugh and spoke to each other through texts. I didn’t see back then what I do now. Everyone asked if there was anything between us and I would say, “Noooo, we just love having each other to talk to.” How wrong was I?!

We were out of touch for a year or so. Little did I know, things were about to change. The friendship was always there. We went on so many nights out together with friends. I lost count of the times we would spent chatting away on the curb outside whilst everyone else carried on the drunken antics waiting for food or a taxi home. The conversations were about absolutely anything – it was just so easy. We had come a long way from the silence in the corridors! At this point, I knew there was a connection, something that got stronger as the weeks went by. And the weeks turned into months.

What happened next? We were speaking most days or every day now. Danny gave me my first “Happy Valentine’s Day” message. He carried me over the puddles in the rain on Boxing Day 2012 (remembering key dates again). We would always dance together. The smiles were meaning more every time we looked at each other. Danny always made sure I got home safe – he even waited outside a club for me once. There wasn’t a time where he didn’t look out for me. Whenever I entered the same room, he would come and give me a hug. So, most people would think we were together now. And when I look back at photos, I think, “Wow, Danny didn’t half stick around!”

We finally had a realisation, it was probably mostly me to blame for taking so long. One night in the midst of everyone having fun and enjoying themselves, we took a moment to ourselves.

After several attempts of figuring out and asking if I would be his girlfriend, I finally took some faith in the friendship we had. I was always terrified if anything went wrong and would ruin in. What a fool, Tasha! Every day since has helped to building a new level closeness, my best friend, and the man I fall in love with every day.

Up until a few years ago, I said said my greatest fear was losing Danny. I don’t even picture that anymore. We dance in the living room, in the kitchen, wherever we feel like it, in the house we are happy to call our home. Those hugs from day one meant so much and now I get them every day. You might have read in earlier posts from December and January that Danny proposed – I am going to be his wife! I’m laughing as I type tis post because we always said if we were alone at 40, we would come back to each other. Turns out, we were never going to wait that long. Of course, there’s more love in the air because we are going to be parents. 4th July this year marks 5 weeks until our first baby’s due date. He clearly knows I am talking about him because he is wriggling around inside me right now.

The reason for sharing this post is to show that trusting your feelings and letting go of “what ifs” can make a whole lot of difference in life. Danny and I can look back and see everything we have built together even through the many things that have hit us. Whether it be difficult days or exciting days, he will always be the one I turn to. There’s no one than knows me better than Danny. The most romantic, kind-hearted, handsome man I am lucky to call mine.

Here’s to the next chapter and falling in love all over again when we meet our baby boy and get the wedding planning started.