young man walking over the bridge

You Shouldn’t Hold Your Feelings Inside

Why do so many of us hold our feelings inside? A lot of people think we feel with our hearts and think with our minds which is true for the most part. But what about when you let your mind control how you feel? We are so quick to judge someone before we know what they are going through – perhaps they don’t ever tell you. Is this why we can refuse to open up about our own feelings?

I think we need a world with more empathy. People should be able to speak up about what they’re experiencing with the thought of them not having it has hard as somebody else. We all suffer in some kind of way at least once in our life whether it be grief, relationships, battling your own mind just to name a few.

So why shouldn’t you hold your feelings inside?

When you think about how of us are on the planet, don’t you think it’s shame we live in a world where people can’t open up, to share experiences, understand each other, and most of all to try and help each other or be there for one another?

When I cry, there’s only a handful of people that know what to do. Most expect me to be smiley all the time because I don’t overly share what’s going on, only when it gets tough. And for me that’s works. For others too, privacy is important and only letting people in when they let you in, works fair in my eyes. But it’s so important that when someone is there for you 1000% not to shut them out. Especially when they’re always making an effort with you. Otherwise you’ll only end up pushing them away and loneliness is the last thing you want.

No matter how perfect you might think someone’s got it, the likeliness is that, they will continue to be there for you. They might have or might not have experienced the same thing. But it doesn’t mean they can’t listen. If something is dragging you down more than it ever has before or more than it should, speak to someone. Whoever that person might be – your friend, parent, grandparent, work colleague, doctor, counsellor – talk to them.

You’ll be surprised how often people underestimate the power of a small chat. It’s not supposed to ‘fix’ things magically but it helps. If gives you a sense of acceptance and gives you an insight that you never seen before to deal with the pain you’re feeling.

You, me, the queen, celebrities, all of us, are human.

Listening to someone is one of the kindest things you can do. And for people on the other side, don’t sit there and think, “They don’t want to or won’t listen to this.” There are people in the world with a heart you know. When they realise that you’ve been battling your own thoughts so much is something that would probably hurt them too.

The reality is some days/weeks/months/years will be tougher than others. When you lose someone close to you, the healing process isn’t something that can be measured for each person. We’re all different and cope in our own ways. Memories are so precious. Always hold onto them.

The other day I visited my granny and grandad at the cemetery and I cried for the first time in years. Getting older can make you stronger, it doesn’t mean to say that because you cry you’re weak. Others might ask themselves why I cried when it’s been over 17 years for one of them. That’s because your heart never lets go of love. I wouldn’t just shut off my feelings towards them because they’re not here, it’s not how life works. I like to know that I can talk about them any time I want with my boyfriend and talk about memories with mum, dad and my brothers.

There will be times when everything will get on top of each other

When a certain amount of time passes by you’ve started to learn how to deal with a situation… then life happens. Since my uncle passed away this year I’ve realised that losing another family member doesn’t make it easier. You still grieve. You’ll cry when you don’t want to. But you soon realise that it’s okay and that you shouldn’t apologise when these things happen in front of people. If we held those feelings inside we would have an outburst one day and it’s a whole lot healthier to let your tears out.

If you’re someone who is going through some stuff right now that doesn’t seem ‘serious enough’ to talk about, if it’s getting you down then it’s important. Don’t think you’re going to be a burden to someone. Open up to someone and you might just see a new perspective.

16 thoughts on “You Shouldn’t Hold Your Feelings Inside

  1. Thanks for sharing. I used to be the one keeping my emotions, until I realised how much time I’ve wasted just because I didn’t put enough effort to – just say it. Have a great day ahead, Tasha!

  2. This is beautifully well said! It seems as if we are living in a world where only selective emotions and feelings are allowed to be shared, which definitely shouldn’t be that way. I was always one to keep my emotions inside and just deal with them on my own later. It’s only the recent years where I’m learning on how to freely show them, and it’s definitely way more beneficial. Thanks for sharing. Have a wonderful day!

    1. You’re right – it seems as though particular emotions can be others and others can’t be. It’s not a bad thing to keep some things to yourself but when it’s something that could help when shared, that’s when we need to be brave and speak up. Thank you so much for reading 🙂

  3. I absolutely love this post. I agree with you 100 percent. I myself need to work on this. I share my feelings in my journal and through my blogs and poems. However it is hard for me to open up and express myself to people sometimes. I am the person everyone runs to for advice so I try to be strong and just manage my feelings as much as I can. But you have a point holding on to it isn’t healthy. I needed to read this. Thank you.

    1. Blogging is a point I turn too, to share my thoughts. Wow again me too, the person who everyone runs to! And everyone always says how I’m the ‘strong one’. I might be but it doesn’t mean I don’t get down or cry.

      Thank you for reading 🙂

      1. No problem . I definitely get where you’re coming from. I was thinking of doing a post about why it’s important to check on your strong friend. I see you can relate. Let me know if you want to collaborate on a blog post. 😊

  4. Absolutely love this post, it’s a great reminder for me to be more open, especially with those who are closest to me. It has been a long journey but I’m getting there and this sums my thoughts up perfectly!

    1. That’s exactly why I wrote this post, for people to relate to. So I’m glad you can relate. I hope it helps you think about opening to others more. Thanks for reading 🙂

  5. This is a really good read!
    As you say we are all human and all have feelings and emotions, though some pretend that they don’t.

    If we bottle things up then things will never get dealt with and it will do a lot of damage in the long run.

    It’s important to be honest and open.

    Love Lozza xo
    http://girlygabble.com

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